It's funny. Do you know me? I know you. I saw you standing under a tree laughing as you once could as tiny drops of joy fell from the branches glistening in the sunlight and diminishing upon your timid head. It's sad. Did you love me? I loved you, as a child staring up at you. I heard once that you adored me, held my miniature hand, late at night swinging back and forth back and forth on a lazy swing listening to the crickets' song. There was a charming evening smell that is still so memorable to me. It was a cool, cool summer night. I lay in your lap my head upon your chest listening to your musical heart beat that I will never hear again. My little arms around your neck that are reaching but cannot attain with the over-sized sweater cascading over my petite fingers. You whispering small short words of witty tales that mean so much more now than the few moments it took for you to shape them. The stars swallowed the breaths of joy we offered to the cool summer darkness trembling in the infinity laying before us. It's painful. Did you think of me? I always think of you. All you have left me to ponder are these questions and to try to comprehend my imagination. I imagine you thought of me. Hoping you thought of how it used to be when we were children. I wish you thought of all the amusing things you did. I pray you thought of how special you were to me, to us. It's confusing. Can you understand me? I wish I understood you. Then perhaps I would have been able to lay in your mind during all the bad times and make you feel good. I suppose it is too late. You were already lost in the cold and I remember you from the warmth. The sun is awakening, what will happen then? You won't be there and I will be so alone, with the air surrounding me and melancholy suffocating my heart. Oh how I loved you. It's heartbreaking. Can you hear me? I can't and couldn't hear you. If I had heard you crying to the vast sea of stars crying silently by yourself I would have dashed to your side. I would have held up this life in my hands. I would have saved you. I promise I would have saved you.
© 2001 Copyright Elizabeth Mills
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